Phlegm

the creatures of the night usually put up quite a fight but if you poke them in the eye they will often start to cry

those little bastards in the rafters of your mind’s lidless sky

but if you’re looking for some kicks head on down to River Styx prick your ears up to the wind and you will hear some kindred spirits singing something going like this:

Phlegm! Phlegm! Sing “Hey!” for the praises of Phlegm!

it feels so funny when it’s running down your throat into your stomach but it’s better when it’s wetter (why use spit to seal a letter?)

oh, it’s chewy and it’s tasty just as good as steak-n-gravy

it’s the homemade gum that lasts for hours: chewing gives you oral powers

Phlegm: it cures what ails you! Phlegm is Nature’s mouth-glue!

and

if you really liked your friends then you would share your Phlegm with them and they would love you till your end:

Suffocation via Snot (we think you’ll like it quite a lot!)

Snort it Down! Hack it Up! Spit it Out! That’s what Phlegm is all about!

marvel as it flies past your lips onto the thighs of smiling passers-by (smiling for one simple reason…your personal secretion!)

so when you’re feeling down and out with all your might let loose a spout (until the demons kick you out)

Phlegm.